Monday, 12 January 2015

HOW TO: Be gentle with yourself

She's So Lucy // How To Be Gentle With Yourself

2015 seems to have got off to a rocky start for me. Despite setting myself clear goals for what I want to achieve, I spent the majority of the first week of the year just panicking, oh so stupidly, about how I'd get these things done. My thought process seemed to go off on a tangent and resulted in me getting overall concerned about my life because I've managed to convince myself that A won't happen, therefore B, C... XYZ won't happen either. 

What it seems I forgot to include in my goals is to be a bit gentler with myself. I can be my own worst enemy and critic at the best and worst of times, and I think we can all be guilty of this sometimes too. Speaking personally, even when I've achieved something brilliant, something I should be so proud of, I'm constantly telling myself it isn't that great, it isn't good enough and I need to try harder. Mental, I know. I stumbled upon this image on Pinterest and it touched me as it seemed so perfect for how I've been feeling. Although I may not have 'achieved' this state of mind, I thought I'd share some 'mini goals' just to remind you and I why we need to be a bit nicer to ourselves...

1. You only live once. Yeah, I said it. YOLO! What a dreadful phrase. Regardless, life is far too short to be spent getting ourselves wound up as to why something we've been wanting to achieve hasn't happened yet. Let things be, take one step at a time and things will fall into place...

2.... because everything happens for a reason. I live by this mantra, day in day out. If you're not succeeding yet or something hasn't gone right in your day, it's because it happens for a reason. I'm finding myself getting wound up over my life post-graduation, convincing myself that in my current job where, if I'm honest, I'm actually progressing really well (especially considering I'm doing my final year of my degree alongside it!), and I'm worried I won't progress any further. Considering my circumstances, I should be really bloody proud of what I'm achieving. Don't drop the ambition, just take a step back and take a look at what you've achieved. You're doing so well, keep going!

3. You are you. Stop with the comparing. Stop it! Here's a little confession: my blog and my YouTube channel are actually a project I'm doing for one of my modules at University (everything fell into place at the right time, I've always wanted to create my own nugget on the internet and it's amazing that this is actually part of my degree!) and I feel I'm pushing myself to be successful in a very short space of time. By no means am I trying to come across as un-genuine, or desperate for a large audience. No way! However I'm constantly finding myself comparing myself to other people's success (both online, in my personal life, and in my work life). What I seem to forget, and many of us too, is that we don't know a persons circumstances, we don't know how long they've been doing what they're doing and most importantly, we will get nowhere  watching other people succeed whilst we're in the same position! Focus on yourself, better yourself, and keep looking back on what you're achieving. 


It's Monday. Take a deep breath, today is a new day, it is a new year and you know what, the week has only just begun. Take things one step at a time, things will all fall into place in their own way. As long as you're doing the best you can, you'll be fine.

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13 comments

  1. So good - I am still learning this but its a good one to learn - be kind to yourself and quit the self punishment:)

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    1. Woohoo, lets learn it together Kezia! It's such an important lesson to learn :) xx

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  2. This post reminds me of a quote, I'm not sure of the origin, but I was just talking about it on another blogger's post: "We all have two lives, the second begins the moment we realize we only have one."

    I think that goes hand in hand with you only live once, and be kind to yourself. This is it, this is all we get - and we really have to chill out and enjoy it, you know? 2014 was a huge year for me in terms of learning how to relax and not be so hard on myself.

    Z. | J. POTTER

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    1. Ooh that's a great quote, definitely one that makes you think. It's harder to learn it than you'd think, don't you reckon? I'm glad you got to understand to relax last year and can now appreciate its importance xx

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  3. i definitely believe that everything happens for a reason, it's such a good thing to live by. thanks for sharing these :)

    xx danielle // shades of danielle // bloglovin

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    1. Eek, it really does! It's quite scary how everything happens when you reflect upon it, really! xx

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  4. Great advice, thank you for sharing :) I love your blog and I have followed you with Bloglovin. If you ever get a chance to check out my blog I would be delighted, thanks!

    Camille xo

    www.cococami.blogspot.co.uk

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    1. Hi Camille! I'm just going to pop over to your blog now, see you there! xx

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  5. Everything really does happen for a reason, sometimes you have to loosen your gip on your goal and all of a sudden it will work out. I got pregnant a month after I'd accepted I was probably infertile!

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    1. SO right, Laura! When you just let things 'be', that's when it all tends to fall into place. And of course, you of all people know that, now you have your beautiful baby! xx

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  6. Love this post its so inspiring. I've actually gotten really self conscious about my size and how I look at myself. I have actually invested my christmas money into getting private health advice/personal training. The big thing I need to do is probably find some acceptance for the moment and realise that its ok to look the way I do at the moment, even if I'm not happy. Also need to focus on more positives than negatives. Would really love to blog about it but struggling!

    http://graceoliviablog.blogspot.co.uk/

    x

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  7. For some reason January has been really tough for a lot of people, myself included. Thank you for posts like this x

    Stefanie | Casualllyawkward | Bloglovin

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  8. Thank you for this post. Love your blog!

    http://withlovefromnicole.blogspot.com/

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